The Demon Within A one-shot
by TheSnowyAngel
Summary: Peeta does the unspeakable. What will it take for him to move on?


The Demon Within.

**This is my entry for asdfghjklaurenn's 'Life After Mockingjay' contest (on Wattpad). I hope you guys like it.**

**Special Dedication: This story is dedicated to my amazing god-sister and god-brother, Ashley and Bryan. Thanks for being so funny, awesome and caring. I don't know what my life would be without you guys to always cheer me up. **

**Please listen to the song Sam Tsui and Max Schneider's cover of "Demons" by Imagine Dragons after reading. I feel that this song describes Peeta perfectly. I'd prefer it if you listened to it while reading but you could listen to it after. **

Peeta clutched a small shard of glass in his already bloody hands. This was the first time he had a flashback in 15 years, he could feel blood boiling and his heart racing. He held his head in agony and dropped to his knees, the burning venom coursed through his veins, spreading throughout his body.

Poison slowly worked it's way up to his brain; it felt ice-cold and made Peeta shiver violently. His brain felt like it was burning compared to the rest of his body, he felt it pressed against his skull. Peeta could hear a voice, but it wasn't recognizable. It was small and gentle, similar to the voice of a young girl.

Visions clouded his mind; he looked ahead and saw Katniss, his beloved Katniss, aiming her arrows at a line of people. They all looked at him with pleading eyes. The first that fell was Rue, he watched in horror as the arrow pierced through her stomach and she fell into a deep pit. The next was Cinna; he's shot in the head and follows Rue down the pit.

He heard a voice too; it was deep and villainous. _"Come on, kill her." _It was as if President Snow was right there, whispering into his ear. _"Kill the Mockingjay, save innocent lives."_ At the end of the line was his father. He gives him a smile, his eyes filled with so much love and compassion. He opens his mouth to speak but falls into the pit. Peeta tried to scream but the poison fills his throat and he starts to spit out black foam. A deep and cold laugh bounced off the walls, it grew louder and louder until it became deafening. He pressed his hands to his ears.

"Not real… it's not real," he mutters. He looks at other shards of glass on the floor; the sunlight shines on them, making them sparkle slightly. They remind him of blades; the same blades the Capitol tipped with venom and tortured him with. Suddenly he loses control; he shoves the girl to the ground then pushes her against the wall. A menacing snarl escapes his lips as he squeezes her throat. It felt small and breakable. He pressed the glass onto her face and slowly slid it across her left check.

Tears stream down the girl's face, Peeta could feel her tremble against his hands. "Please Papa, it's not real," she quivers. Peeta froze… _Papa_… that's impossible…

He releases her and watched as she fell to the floor, barely conscious. Tiny drops of blood drips from the cut on her face, she looks up at him. Her features matched those of the Mockingjay; olive skin, dark brown hair in a braid… but something caught his attention, her eyes weren't grey but a beautiful shade of light blue.

Gradually, the venom started to wear off; memories started to flood his mind. The girl isn't Katniss… it's his daughter. Slowly, he raises his hand and places it on her bloody cheek. Ashley flinched and Peeta pulled his hand back. "What happened?" he asked.

He looked at the cold glass in his right hand; it was dripping with blood. "Did I do this to you?" Ashley stayed silent, her gaze dropped to the floor. "Real or not real?"

Eventually the girl gave a small nod. Her eyes were swimming with tears as her father pulled her into a long hug. Thankfully, she understood what her parents went through in the past; she knew about the Hunger Games. She didn't ask any questions whenever these things happen.

"It's okay Papa, I know it's not your fault."

Peeta feels even guiltier after hearing that. His daughter was too mature for her age; a 12-year-old shouldn't be this understanding. He wanted her to cry, yell at him… but this was too hard to bear.

.

..

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10 days after the incident, Ashley was finally allowed to remove her stiches. Peeta watched as the nurse carefully cut the thread and pull it out with her tweezers. Every time he sees his daughter wince, another wave of guilt hits him in the chest. He stares in amazement as she lifted her head higher for the nurse to get a better view. She definitely inherited her bravery from Katniss.

5 days afterwards, a scar formed. Everyday, Peeta couldn't help himself from staring at the pink line on her face; the scar would be there forever and the worst part was he caused it.

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..

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Peeta smeared another coat of red paint on his latest creation. It's a painting of a white rose smothered in blood. It lay on a metal table, the same table he was tortured on. The background is painted in a blinding white but the edges of the canvas are a disgusting deep carmine colour, the colour of dried blood.

Deep in concentration, he doesn't even hear Katniss as she approaches him. She wraps her hands around his torso and stares at the painting. "Can't sleep?" Peeta ask. He can feel her nod against his back. "Peeta… you know that it wasn't your fault, right? Ashley knows it too… we all do."

The brush falls to the floor with a clank. Peeta stiffens, "I wish I could be a normal father… someone that isn't a danger to his children."

"But you are, Peeta. You are an amazing father; you have to stop blaming yourself for these things," Katniss says softly.

"I hurt her Katniss!" he yells. "I hurt my own child but she didn't even cry or run away! She's too stubborn for her own good…" He drops to his knees and put his head in his hands. "I'm a danger to you and to everyone else."

"No you're not." Peeta and Katniss turn to see Ashley standing by the door, "Everybody has their own demons Papa. You're no exception… you have to forgive yourself."

She runs up to her father and jumps into his arms. "Please stop this Papa. We need you," she whispers. Peeta looks up at Katniss, she nods her head. Ashley holds him even tighter, using all her might to pull away the pain. He wraps his arms around her, careful not to squeeze. He still has that fear of crushing and hurting her. "I'm so sorry Ashley," he whispers.

Ashley was right; he can't live in fear of hurting his loved ones, he needs to keep moving. And he can start with the artwork behind him, "Come on. Let's go burn this painting."

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**Thanks for reading this story. Review!**

**-TheSnowyAngel**


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